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3 Unexpected Benefits of Quitting Porn

Are there any benefits of quitting porn? If you’re struggling with porn addictions, you may be wondering if there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. When things get tough, you need to be reminded of what you’re ultimately fighting for. Here are 3 benefits of quitting porn that you may not have anticipated. […]
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Rebuilding Emotional Safety In Your Damaged Relationship

Can I find safety in a world (& in my relationship) that feels unsafe? Our human form is relatively fragile. Resilient in many ways, of course, but even the most cursory amount of attention to the news reveals the many ways our bodies and spirits can be harmed. And we live in a part of […]
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Alone vs. Lonely

When working with my male clients who struggle with compulsive sexual behavior, one of the common denominators in the reasons they act out is being alone. Particularly if the behavior is pornography addiction where privacy represents one of the conditions for being able to peruse porn in the first place. A recent client on a […]
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Sex & Love Addiction from a Buddhist Perspective

In the land of the strange but true, as a former Tibetan Buddhist nun I fell in love with and married a man who counsels sex addicts and who is a recovering sex addict himself. Joining him in his counseling practice has allowed me a look into the lives of many people who have struggled […]
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Don't Rattle My Cage: 4 Steps To Dealing With An Annoying Person

If you’ve ever had difficulty relating to someone  in your life — and, c’mon, who hasn’t? — you may have gotten stressed by something they said or did. In slang terms, they “rattled your cage.” Other slang terms meaning to aggravate or annoy include “gets on my nerves,” “up in my grill,” or “messing with […]
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Porn Addiction Masquerading As A Game—Chatroulette

Type the address. Load webcam. Drop pants. And click go. That was the norm for me on a site known as Chatroulette. I discovered the site in the most innocuous way. A few guys were on it at work. I went on it with them and we started joking, talking, socializing, and trolling with the […]
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Porn Addiction Is A Progressive Disorder (But You Can Stop Before It's Too Late)

Recently, there was some truly troubling news out of New Jersey. A man was arrested and charged with two counts of Endangering the Welfare of a Child after it was discovered that content from his live-streaming porn service involved children. To put that in plain English, the guy was putting 14-year-olds in webcam shows, and […]
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Addict is Fake News

Fake news—or a hoax—is making, well, news, a lot these days and has become a buzzword representing misrepresentation and falsehoods. Fake news is written and published with the intent to mislead in order to gain financially or politically, often with sensationalist, exaggerated, or patently false headlines that grab attention. If you are someone who seeks […]
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Dating Apps: Helping Relationships or Normalizing Sex Addiction?

It can be difficult to meet people sometimes. Our multitasking culture demands more of our time than ever before, and that means longer workdays, less vacation, and far fewer opportunities to bump into “the one.” So, in this regard dating apps seem inevitable. If we can't be out in the real world looking for relationships, […]
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Porn Doc Is In: Disclosure How To & About Support

Porn addiction and sex addiction experts from Compulsion Solutions answer your most pressing questions. We’ll answer your question too… e-mail Porn Doc. Dear Porn Doc, My partner and I are both in recovery. I am at peace with the idea of moving forward from this point being honest and open about my sexual addiction. What I am not so […]
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Porn Guilt — The Gift That Keeps On Giving

Guilt about your porn addiction, your acting out sexually, is the gift that keeps on giving and giving and giving — until you’re in the emotional gutter and your self-esteem is toast. Guilt. You feel "less than." Guilt. You isolate. You forget about your friends. You are sure that they must be better off than […]
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Abuse In The Porn Industry Can Cause Troubling Behavior In Addicts

Allegations of sexual assault against male porn star “James Deen” have surfaced recently, after a number of female actresses have come forward with stories of being brutalized. After reading the stories these women told, I was wondering how on earth such brutality could ever be okay. If you hit a woman with a closed fist, […]
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How To Tell If You're Addicted To Sex

In its basic and natural form (if there has not been physical or emotional damage along the way) human sexual contact feels good, touching feels good, having an orgasm feels good. This is normal and wonderful. Your innate desire for sex and sexual pleasure is not an enemy. Your natural sexual impulse can guide you […]
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Depression and Sex Addiction

The old adage: What came first, the chicken or the egg? When it comes to the symbiotic relationship between sex addictions and depression, it is often difficult to determine which caused which. When working with people who struggle with compulsive sexual behavior, depression often rides just beneath the surface. One acts out sexually to avoid […]
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First Thought Wrong

In the process of your sex addiction recovery, you might begin to notice a strange phenomenon. You want to do better, you want to recover and get well, but someone keeps telling you that you can't do it. It's not a friend, or brother, or your partner, or your boss — it's you. Your mind […]
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“I’m Frustrated Because My Wife Won’t Initiate Sex” – Sound Familiar?

Working with men who are grappling with sex and porn addictions, I often hear a complaint come up in our counseling sessions: my wife won’t initiate sex and that’s frustrating to me. This is something that a lot of guys deal with. It’s almost viewed as a type of rejection. You yourself express appreciation for […]
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Sex Addiction: Let’s Break the Stigma

When you break your arm, you go to the hospital and get it treated. There is no shame or hesitation involved. You experience the injury/pain and go to get it treated accordingly; no one blinks an eye. When it comes to psychological disorders, however, the story is entirely different. When you have depression, anxiety, sex […]
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Disclosing Your Sexual History

One of the most challenging (and daunting!) tasks in sex addiction recovery is disclosing your sexual history to your partner. Since most of it may be attributed to a progressive addiction, what you put down reveals much more than just the content. You’re vulnerable, transparent, and wide open for criticism. So why even do it? […]
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How “Believing Your Own Press” Can Get You in Trouble With Addiction

Recently, a story broke about a YouTube star in his 20s named Austin Jones who’s being sent to jail for 10 years. Why? Because he requested sexually explicit videos of underage girls. He did this numerous times, and the content of these videos as described in the press is terrible. It's easy enough to look […]
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Choosing Connection Over Performance

Men, young and old, who are porn addicts, often experience erectile dysfunction (ED) and related sexual performance anxiety. Although research on porn-induced ED is mixed, I can tell you firsthand that many of my clients, individuals and couples alike, are negatively impacted. It can be difficult to measure the far-reaching effects of viewing too much […]
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