CONTACT US NOW | (925) 932-0201

5 Signs A Little Bit of Porn Has Become a Big Problem

All guys do it, right?  It doesn't mean you have a problem. It's not an addiction, is it? Why can't I watch a little porn?   The problem for some men is that sex is an addictive substance, similar to alcohol and drugs.  Think of it in terms of social drinkers vs. alcoholics: one can […]
Read More

6 Things That Get Better After Quitting Porn

Maybe porn stopped working. You need more of it, or something further out than you used to need, and it still doesn't land the way it once did — and some part of you is more unsettled by that than by the habit itself. Or maybe you've already said it. I'm done. You've said it […]
Read More

Can “Looking” be a Symptom of Sex Addiction?

Can “looking” or ogling be a symptom of your sex compulsion? Does looking trigger you into deep fantasy leading to compulsive sexual thoughts that won’t stop until you act out? Often times “ogling” is a step in the wrong direction for sex addicts, leading to other unhealthy sexual behavior. It hurts spouses too - the […]
Read More

What Tiger Woods Can Show Us About Sex Addiction: It Begins in Childhood

His scandal was tabloid fodder — but the roots ran back to childhood. What Tiger Woods' very public fall reveals about how sex addiction really starts. Tiger Woods' sex-addiction scandal made headlines worldwide — but the real story starts decades earlier, in childhood. Even though I don't regularly follow golf, this caught my attention, because […]
Read More

Sex Or Porn Detox: 4 Steps

A porn "detox" isn't just willpower — it's a process. Here are the 4 steps to break the cycle and make it actually stick. If you struggle with sexual compulsion behavior, have you tried "detoxing" from porn and/or sex? Detoxes seem to be all the rage. People are removing certain types of foods from their […]
Read More

Dealing with Withdrawal Symptoms of Sex Addiction

Attempting to stop your sexual compulsion behavior requires a non-simple truth: the need to become comfortable with feeling uncomfortable. Once you have acknowledged you need sex addiction help, and made the decision to get help, you need to prepare yourself for a period of dealing with the withdrawal symptoms of sex addictions. Like any drug […]
Read More

Can I Masturbate During Recovery?

One of recovery's most-asked questions — and the answer isn't a flat yes or no. Here's how to tell healthy from addictive. One of the most common questions I get from the men I help with sex addiction recovery is: Can I masturbate during recovery? Will this set me back? How can I tell the […]
Read More

7 Signs Your Partner Is A Sex Addict

If something seems amiss in your sexual relationship with your partner, it's possible that he is compulsively using internet porn or sexual connection with others in a destructive way and may need help with porn addiction. There are warning signs you might see if your partner is having a problem with sexual compulsive behavior. These […]
Read More

COVID-19 Is Affecting Addiction To Porn

The devastating Coronavirus, COVID-19, has affected almost every single person in our country in one way in another. It has spread to more than 150,000 people at the time of writing this blog, has severely impacted our economy, and has forced many people to work from home or not work at all. But there is […]
Read More

3 Ways To Rebuild Trust In A Relationship Damaged By Sex Addiction

Each couple shares a sort of bank account, not an account built on currency, but rather one supported by trust. When the relationship is impacted by sex addictions or porn addictions, when one of the partners acts out sexually, that partner essentially bankrupts the account. They withdraw a large amount of trust that shakes the […]
Read More

Porn Withdrawal Symptoms: What to Expect

Is porn addiction withdrawal a thing? Yes, as with any addiction, it is absolutely a real thing. And there are plenty of practical ways to work through this stage in your brain’s healing. Here’s how to get started. What Porn Withdrawal Symptoms Feel Like There is no single version of this. Just as no two […]
Read More

3 Unexpected Benefits of Quitting Porn

Quitting porn can reset your brain's reward system, bring back real attraction, and sharpen your focus — often within weeks. Here's what actually changes. The 3 biggest benefits of quitting porn: Your brain's reward system starts to heal Real attraction and intimacy come back More focus, energy, and confidence Are there any benefits of quitting […]
Read More

Rebuilding Emotional Safety In Your Damaged Relationship

Can I find safety in a world (& in my relationship) that feels unsafe? Our human form is relatively fragile. Resilient in many ways, of course, but even the most cursory amount of attention to the news reveals the many ways our bodies and spirits can be harmed. And we live in a part of […]
Read More

Alone vs. Lonely

When working with my male clients who struggle with compulsive sexual behavior, one of the common denominators in the reasons they act out is being alone. Particularly if the behavior is pornography addiction where privacy represents one of the conditions for being able to peruse porn in the first place. A recent client on a […]
Read More

Sex & Love Addiction from a Buddhist Perspective

In the land of the strange but true, as a former Tibetan Buddhist nun I fell in love with and married a man who counsels sex addicts and who is a recovering sex addict himself. Joining him in his counseling practice has allowed me a look into the lives of many people who have struggled […]
Read More

Don't Rattle My Cage: 4 Steps To Dealing With An Annoying Person

If you’ve ever had difficulty relating to someone  in your life — and, c’mon, who hasn’t? — you may have gotten stressed by something they said or did. In slang terms, they “rattled your cage.” Other slang terms meaning to aggravate or annoy include “gets on my nerves,” “up in my grill,” or “messing with […]
Read More

Porn Addiction Masquerading As A Game—Chatroulette

Type the address. Load webcam. Drop pants. And click go. That was the norm for me on a site known as Chatroulette. I discovered the site in the most innocuous way. A few guys were on it at work. I went on it with them and we started joking, talking, socializing, and trolling with the […]
Read More

Porn Addiction Is A Progressive Disorder (But You Can Stop Before It's Too Late)

Recently, there was some truly troubling news out of New Jersey. A man was arrested and charged with two counts of Endangering the Welfare of a Child after it was discovered that content from his live-streaming porn service involved children. To put that in plain English, the guy was putting 14-year-olds in webcam shows, and […]
Read More

Addict is Fake News

Fake news—or a hoax—is making, well, news, a lot these days and has become a buzzword representing misrepresentation and falsehoods. Fake news is written and published with the intent to mislead in order to gain financially or politically, often with sensationalist, exaggerated, or patently false headlines that grab attention. If you are someone who seeks […]
Read More

Dating Apps: Helping Relationships or Normalizing Sex Addiction?

It can be difficult to meet people sometimes. Our multitasking culture demands more of our time than ever before, and that means longer workdays, less vacation, and far fewer opportunities to bump into “the one.” So, in this regard dating apps seem inevitable. If we can't be out in the real world looking for relationships, […]
Read More
linkedin facebook pinterest youtube rss twitter instagram facebook-blank rss-blank linkedin-blank pinterest youtube twitter instagram